Paul F. Tompkins
TV & standup & improv & podcasts, hardly any movies
paulftompkins.com/live
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- 7th grade Spanish teacher taught us that patatas bravas were called that because the potatoes were brave for going into the spicy sauce and I will cherish that thought for the rest of my life. Honor them. Honor their sacrifice
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- Oh, I see how it is
- They should invent a sunshine for when she’s gone
- Bessent is rich, Rogan is rich, all of these MAGA mouthpieces are rich who are telling working citizens to suck it up and lose their livelihoods to provide tax cuts for the uber-wealthy. It's Jim Jones handing out Kool-aid, and the cultists are drinking it down, until they lose too much and rise up.
- My morning coffee is strong, but apparently not strong enough for the analogy police.
- I love my job as the guy who adds a fake “keep me signed in” checkbox to every website that does nothing
- Man are lonely? Weak. Growing up my father managed by bonding with me over shared hobbies, such as watching tv and having sex with people who aren’t my mom.
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- It’s a difficult time for young men, growing up in a culture that no longer provides them with strong role models like Robert Wadlow, the fat biker twins, or the Indian guy with the long fingernails
- Morning ritual Husband to cats: “Does anybody here like…cat food?” Cats: meowing loudly “I said…does anyone here like cat food?” *cats go totally insane*
- Back in Los Angeles!
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- Ruin a movie by adding “: The Shitty Movie That Sucks” to the title. Do not do this in the replies, this is solely an exercise for the reader to conduct in their own head
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- Piyokki, a 15-day-old chick who wears a hat and loves mangoes, is the mascot for a singer called Shin Hioki.
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- but im a jeep im a vehicle what the hell am i doing here beep beep honk honk steer
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- you're gonna wanna see this
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- I wonder what my old friend the Chicken Man is up to these days. Does he still live in Philly? I hope he’s doing okay. Now to relax and listen to this new Bruce Springsteen album
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