Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I run a kill shelter for small dogs 💖
- Fig 1—RFK Jr. fully submerged in raw sewage, currently being made fun of by dimwitted shitposters. Fig 2—Sephiroth surrounded by raw mako crystal that is pure life force made matter, merging his physical body with the planet's lifestream before ultimately ascending to godhood. But make your jokes…
- Sad news. Former AZ Senator Kyrsten Sinema has died today after pulling down an overladen rack of ugly Goodwill clothes she wanted to mismatch. She exploded in a clatter of big chunky beads and chunky glasses and other ugly chunky plastic shit. Her evil animating spirit will, of course, never die.
- Wife & I started a prank war to see who could scare the other off the toilet "midpipe" with points scored for how many clods hit the floor outside of the bowl, but now she won't stop barging in with a broom and walloping me across the head and neck until I fall off. That's not a proper prank, angel.
- Whispers abound that the papal conclave has included a surprise contender for pope: a black man in a floor length leather coat sporting sunglasses and a hi top fade. The smiling cardinal dual wields a shotgun and a katana, according to Vatican insiders. His ecclesiastical politics remain a mystery.
