Harri Soinila Comedian
Stand up comedian coming to you all the way from Finland! Lightly carbonated.
- Life Hack: Paint a giant swastika on the hood of your car and people won't even notice it's a Tesla.
- My theory is that #Dutch people are so tall because it's unnatural to live below sea level and it's just nature trying to make sure they can breathe.
- I want to see an action movie that starts with a car chase that destroys a fruit stand, like car chases do… and then follows the fruit vendor on a revenge rampage against every action hero.
- People say a lot of shit about Putin but he's pulled off something I didn't realize was possible. He's got Finnish people rooting for a country with a blue and yellow flag.
- "Those boomers wouldn't have so much financial trouble if they just stopped eating all those damn egg sandwiches!" - Millennials, 2025, probably
- Today I reached peak "Middle Aged Man" by having to get up to pee in the middle of a nap.
- Every time a Gen X says all the new music sounds the same a Gen Z gets its wings.
- Noticed something amusing. Z is the last letter of the alphabet and the last birth year of Gen Z is 2012. So whoever it is naming the generations, they made the same mistake as the ancient Mayans.
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- I found 50€ yesterday and my inner child said I should buy candy and pizza, but my inner adult intervened and said we should buy candy and pizza and beer.
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- Let's see how this expensive wine pairs with the smell of my 2yo's poop.
- Why did Captain America shoot Peter Parker? - He misheard his code name as Spy, German.
- Me: Now we're going home on an airplane! 2yo: The potty is there! This kid gets it. It's nice to travel and experience new things and foods, but it's also nice to get back home and poop in your own potty.
- The 14yo girl I saw wearing a "Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back" hoodie certainly hasn't seen any pictures of me when I was 14.
- Vin Diesel is Groot,
- Just now at the airport: 2yo *sees a man sort of resembling me in an ad* : "Daddy!" Wife: "Is it daddy?" Me: "Yeah, it's me with my Asian family." W: "Are you doing ads without telling me?" M: "THAT'S your main concern?" W: "Yeah, where's the money?" M: "It's going to the other family!"
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- Hey, haha, what if we tried giving everyone human rights as a joke? Haha, just kidding! ...Unless you... want to..?
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- January's been a tough couple of years. Let's see if February finally comes with the sweet release of the apocalypse.
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- Sometimes I worry about the robot uprising but then I try to wash my hands at a gas station and it just looks like I'm filming a Tiktok.
- Sometimes the 2yo brings home craft projects from the daycare and I never really know what to do with them. Luckily, what she brought home this time wasn't a craft project. It was the norovirus.
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- No one will remember - your salary - how busy you were - how many hours you worked People will remember - the typo you maed on a social media platform that doesn't allow editing posts
- Thanks, Youtube Studio, I'll check it out.
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- Gotta admire Skeletor's persistence. They made 130 episodes of the original He-Man animated series plus a Christmas special and a movie. Personally I probably would've given up after the first 70 times of getting beat up by a bodybuilder whose mom cuts his hair.
- Some people are surprised how the people ending democracy are so cringe-y, but when you think about it, it's not really all that strange that the guys admiring the Confederacy and the Nazis are just like them: Losers.
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- Today I'm performing on a cruise where the headliner is Peer Günt. Their most famous is "I Don't Want to Be a Rock'n'Roll Star" but now there are hundreds of people here to see them. I guess not all dreams come true. 🤷🏼♂️
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- This could've easily been a text post but I personally went through the trouble of producing a comedy show, performing it, filming it, editing it and subtitling it. FOR YOU. You're welcome.
- So... On Sunday I have quite the warm-up act! 🤯😄
- Hot take: Having a stabbing ear pain for three days straight is way overrated. I'd barely give it two stars.
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- Stan Lee liked to name his comics with adjectives like The Amazing Spider-Man and Uncanny X-Men, so the _actual_ name of the group with Reed Richards is just Four.
- So if Tom Holland and Zendaya are getting married, is Zendaya going to be Zendaya Holland or is Tom going to be Tom?
- "WTF, they all brought a bag?" - Every airline
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- Hey wait, if there is a Hunter Biden, is there also a Gatherer Biden somewhere?
- I woke up. 1/5 stars, wouldn't recommend.
- So, according to a conversation between Peppa Pig's dad and her uncle, their ACTUAL names are Daddy Pig and Uncle Pig. So, two generations ago two (presumably) unrelated pigs named Grandpa and Granny met, fell in love and had two little boys whom they christened Uncle and Daddy.
- 🤦🏼♂️
- The baby is upset because we had to wake her up earlier than she usually wakes up. Gee, I wonder what that's like.
- Every now and then I worry about the robot uprising but then I try to wash my hands under an automated faucet
- In scifi it's mandatory for every robot builder to install additional red LEDs in the robot's eyes just in case the robot turns evil at some point. #scifi #showerthought
- What happened to you? Did you go to a plastic surgeon who's really good with names?
- Yesterday I saw a guy with a lanyard saying "Carl Hunter" coming out of Messukeskus. I wonder how many Carls he killed in there.
- My eyesight keeps getting worse because it's no longer 2020.
- I have a smart toothbrush with a little display. Most mornings if I brush for at least two minutes it gives me a smiley face. Some mornings if I do a really good job, it gives me a star-eyed smiley face. Some mornings I just can't give a shit about the feelings of a toothbrush.
- All DC superheroes in the movies store their suits on mannequins because, you know, when the bat signal goes on it faster to take it off a plastic figure than pull it out of a drawer.
- Priority boarding is kind of crazy. We pay extra to sit cramped on a plane a bit longer and then everyone takes off at the same time.
