Something I don’t like about my brain;
I was repeatedly told how completely utterly ugly I was (by contrast to pretty people who were very prized) all through a stressy hypercritical childhood. So now whenever I’m stressed or feel incompetent, there’s this tendency for shit body image to surface.
May 14, 2025 03:25Escaping literal decades of torment and conditioning is no small feat.
Learning to be patient with myself took as much effort as the thing itself, and it feels like I'm still just learning.
It's just such a DUMB landmine, you know? Like I'll be beating myself up over my artwork, lack of a future, something not about body image, and my brain will tack on ALSO YOU'RE UGLY.
Maybe I actually look okay, but association is literally the only reason this particular negative message surfaces!
