BEAVE
Spokesperson for beavers. Please take everything I post seriously. 🇨🇦
Beave regular: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:kvec6rzfk4af2gjfiu33ccf2/feed/aaaed5pb5i4jg
Best of: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:kvec6rzfk4af2gjfiu33ccf2/feed/aaakj4nnz7hgi
- Braless with big boobs in oversized t-shirts. That’s just who I am now.
- My sleepy girl cocktail is a mix of THC, a fistful of Cheetos, and passing out drooling while reading a book like a damn lady.
- Every Mother’s Day my son writes me a heartfelt message about how I’ve had “a tough few years, but I’m doing great” which is adorable until you realize he’s been saying that since he learned to spell.
- We’re all warriors surviving a slow-motion apocalypse.
- Using my cleavage like an attention-seeking missile.
- I hope my late-night posts make your morning poop just a little more special.
- At 20, I’d hear a weird noise and stay up all night with a weapon. At 40, I just turn off the light and hope whoever it is finishes the job.
- The only reason I still have Facebook is so I don’t miss the random DMs from guys I dated in high school testing the waters every 9 years to see if my boobs are still great and if I’m emotionally damaged enough to make the same mistakes again.
- Sorry I was acting like a celebrity and didn’t respond to your comments.
- Do you really have insomnia or are you just ignoring the fact you were built to be a vampire?