McSweeney's
The official Bluesky feed of McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, & McSweeney's Books.
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- "INTJ: 'The Nerd Emperor' - Instead of taking the Myers-Briggs test, you’ll write a lengthy Medium post explaining why you refuse to take the Myers-Briggs test."
- "Trump has accepted this gift with nothing but the utmost openness and transparency. It’s not corruption if it’s done shamelessly in full view of the public eye. We haven’t read The Federalist Papers, but we’re pretty sure that’s in there somewhere."
- "Children stand in the middle of Sesame Street, taking turns injecting each other with puberty blockers—the only activity kids are allowed to do in this fifteen-minute city. Big Bird enters wearing assless chaps..."
- "I didn’t stop to smell the roses enough. If I’m being honest with myself, there were other things I didn’t smell enough. If I’m really being honest, I could have licked more stuff too."
- "Could a machine decide to lay off an entire department based on a vague intuition it forms about the market while it half-listens to an Economist podcast during its morning Peloton ride? I don’t think so."
- The question isn’t whether people like my daughter have something to offer. It’s whether society is finally ready to stop measuring value with the wrong scale. Autism doesn’t destroy families. Ignorance does. Isolation does. Shame does.
- "I imagine that you are still sleeping at this moment safe in your own bed."
- "Alice Chamber, who, after three vaginal births, can no longer hiccup without wetting her pants, and who will be honored for her sacrifice with eggs benedict and a necklace made from rigatoni."
- Voicemail: “Hi, sweetie. There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, but it’s not important. Talk to you later.” Urgency: We had to put Bandit down. Two months ago.
- "Autism doesn’t erase potential. It reshapes it. Sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it’s nonlinear. Always, it’s human."
